competition time...

Together with TM Gerry, we arrived at IPSR early. We unload all the TM Materials from my car including a green plastic bag containing some microphone and I don't know. I didn't check what it contain inside. Minutes later, other TM arrived and the rest of the contestants.
While TM Ramed - the Chief Judge - was busy giving instructions to the segment players, I stayed on one corner trying to understand what I have just written hours ago. I am not good in memorizing lines, so I tried to group thoughts and visualize the script like a beautiful lady, err... what else could I compare?
* * * * * * *
The target speaker was TM Willy, who delivered his Speech number 6 with objectives on Vocal Variety. Generally, the speech started with a lamentation of a man for a departed love one. Then he moved the timetable to the past describing the two persona in the story. He made a distinctive progression on how the characters grow up, got separated, and got back together. He briefly segue into a happy mode, a drastic departure from the sad mood of the speech. Then went back to the sad mood, but he set the story on the lamentation of the man - the introduction! He concluded the speech with a challenge to the audience about finding/experiencing true love.
* * * * * * *

that girl named beth

Why do we dream of someone who existed during our past? And have you ever been visited by a recurring dream? Well I do! And it always involves someone who used to the "apple of my eye".

I've written about her before, si Bambeth. She keeps on appearing on my dreams for the past twenty years. The odd thing is that she never grows old (and me too) - we're still in our youthful years. Though the setting keeps changing and sometimes the some cast of characters in my dreams would be different, other than that it's all the same. I will be there, she will be there and we keep repeating the same lines to each other. Lines of love, lost love and love that never was. Lines like:

"Hi bambeth, how are you"

"Jorge, why didn't you tell me soon"

"I was afraid"

"Jorge you know that I did love you and you kept me waiting"

"I didn't know"

"I let you feel it, but you ignore me Jorge"


The only reason I could think of why this dream keeps on coming back is because I have not made a closure with her. Actually, I don't know what to close - hehehe - with her. Nevertheless, one of this days I am going to pay her a visit.

Ano kaya kasalanan ko?

Christian living

The sermon for today was strong. The pastor delivered a message that talks about Christian living and conviction and he further elaborate the topic by exploring the sinful life that the OFWs are walking. Everyone was dumbfounded. I know, each and everyone of us were guilty, and I am no exception. Some shed tears, some kept their silence but were very pensive, while others simply closed their eyes and prayed. Me, on the other end, stared on a blank wall as I tried to recall the transgressions and trespasses that I have committed. Oh! There are so many of them and it makes me shiver even on the sheer thought of possible retribution.

Staying clean and straight in Saudi Arabia is a tall order. Those strong ones who managed to stay pure all agrees that the secret was to keep their selves busy with sports, community service, or church activity. They reasoned that if you keep yourself idle, boredom will knock on your door and sin, no sooner, will knock too.

It is not a fail safe solution, argues the other side. They also tried to get into sports, was active in community service, and even participated on all church activities. Yet, they still fail. And they ask themselves.. why? but didn't get an answer.

As I have written yesterday, most of us - the OFWs - were infected by this "unnamed" disease. It is highly infectious and addictive. It gives a false sense of love, euphoric feeling of completeness, and a way to escape from the painful realities of our own lives. The way I see it, it is the most dangerous drug that our brethren have indulged. It will not only destroy those who takes it, but also the families and friends of the recipient.

As of now, the only "immunization" that I could think of is to bring the family here in the Kingdom. Other than that... prayers!

disease with no name

When we hear of stories about Pinoys who cheat from their wives, we usually ignore them and would sarcastically respond "sus, sino na lang ba'ng hindi?" But when we hear of Pinays who became unfaithful, we easily scorn and judge the woman as "malandi" (flirt). But have we really tried to fathom the main reason why people - regardless of gender - became unfaithful? Don't ask me. I don't know the answer.

If you remember, last Nov 19, I wrote about a taxi driver who shared with me about couples in Saudi that have respective families in the Philippines. I didn't write about this, but for the past 3 months I actually met more than a dozen "couplings" (couples with tempered/fake marriage papers). Not only that, I also met several dozens more lovers that were both married in the Philippines.

When I bluntly ask them why they do it? The simply said "we're only human and we found the love that was never given to us". Most men would answer that they were lonely and only need a warm body - something physical - but it got complicated along the way. Some men would pretend that they are single, fools a woman, falls in love / the woman get pregnant, and ends up with either fake marriage or converts to other religion. Others are candid enough to admit that they are just beefing up their machismo image.

Women on the other hand had more profound answers. They would elaborate the issues with their husband, financial difficulties, loneliness & boredom, got fooled by a sweet-speaking man, and peer pressure. Most of them admit that they were not happy with their marriage and now they found a second change to fulfill that missing part of their life. Some are still in the balance beam, trying to weight things whether to go back or continue. While there are few who are simply naive to believe that the man they are with right now would bring them to eureka.

I am not sure if I would be glad to those coupling who find happiness here, or I should pity those who were mired into this predicament because of complication, or should I knock on the coconuts of those naive girls and tell them to wake up. As I said before, I don't have the answer why this things happens.

Our anthropologist calls this "The Diaspora of the OFW", but I beg to disagree. I believe that this is a disease that inflected not only Filipinos but all other expatriates who stayed away from their families too long.

This is a disease with no name.